Jan.19.24 - Day 1939 - My responsibility

Why do you keep pushing the bar? Why do you keep setting ridiculous goals? Why do you feel the need to be different? To stand out from the crowd? I don’t know. I never feel like I’ve been accepted. I’ve always felt different than everyone around me. Like I was living this life. That this life I was blessed to live is not mine. Like someone else should be doing this. Yet, here I am. In this body with this story with this family and blessed with all these gifts. Hard work, intellect, ambition and privilege. Not many people have that. So it’s my responsibility to do something with it. Its my responsibility to reach someone what I wish I knew. That’s on me. No one else. Could I disappear tomorrow and no one ever read anything I’ve done? Sure. But now that Im here, I need to tell someone how I feel. I need to share with someone what I’m thinking about because it could help them in their lives. That’s why. My life is not that important, just like all our lives. We’re but a grain of sand in the universe. Totally meaningless to a world we have no control over. So might as well contribute something while you’re here, only in a way that I know how. To write, succeed and prove to anyone that if you work hard for long enough and be consistent, you can do the same.

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