A very well researched book on how to be happy using teachings from every religion
Rating: 5/5
‘There is nothing good or bad but thinking makes it so’ - Shakespeare
The whole universe is change and life itself is what you dream it - Marcus Aurelius
Nothing is miserable unless you think it’s so and on the other had, nothing brings happiness unless you are content with it - Aurelius
Your ability to experience happiness and sadness is partially dictated by your genes
CBT was created by Beck in the 60s where he postulated that all events/problems in someone’s life come from decisions/experiences of when they were kids
Reciprocity is the basic currency of all social life
Success is largely a matter of playing the social game well due to our species being ultrasocial
Understand when reciprocity is being used against you and call it out
Mirroring and using reciprocity helps others like you
The great majority of mankind are satisfied with appearances, as though they are realities and are often more influenced by the things seen rather than those that are - Nicola Machiavelli
We tend to be good at judging others but always think of ourselves more highly than we should
People are open to info that predicts the behaviour of others but refuse to adjust their self-assessment
Naive realism: each of us thinks we see the world directly as it really is and don’t acknowledge other people’s opinions
‘Our life is a creation of our mind’ - Budda
Find faults within yourself and acknowledge them when in conflict
Do not seek to have events happen as you want them to but instead want them to happen as they do happen and your life will go well - Epictetus
Happiness can only be found within, by breaking attachments to external things and cultivating an attitude of acceptance
Progress principle: pleasure comes from making progress towards goals rather than achieving them
H=S+C+V
Avoid noise, long commutes, lack of control and shame
You can increase your happiness by strengthening relationships
Experiences give more happiness because they have greater social value
Attachment theory for children: safety and exploration (both in balance)
True love is strong: compassionate love with some passion
People need obligations and constraints to provide structure and meaning in life
Suffering produces endurance, endurance produces character and character produces hope
In the face of trauma, always write about it, unedited, for 15 minutes for 4 days straight. Let it off your chest
6 broad virtues: wisdom, courage, humanity, justice, transcendence and temperance
Elevation is the feeling when you feel happy and inspired after something happens
One can live magnificently in this world if one knows how to work and how to love, to work for the person one loves and to love one’s work - Leo Tolstory
Vital engagement is the key: when your work lines up with what you love to do
Happiness is not something that you can find, acquire or achieve directly. You have to get the conditions right and then wait
A good place to look for wisdom is in the mind of your opponents
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